17 June 2002

i'm still here. i'm still alive. just haven't been writing. well, not writing anything worth mentioning. eden's promise still hangs over me like a darkening cloud. (how's that for cliche?) i want to get it done, since there is a whole bunch of other stuff i wanna work on. but on the other hand, i don't want to rush to finish it, and then get disgusted with myself for rushing through it.

so far, i've not attempted to read the whole thing yet, aside from the first few pages. i got quickly frustrated by the glaring errors i saw, like neon signs saying "DUMMY" everywhere. i've ot been in the right mindset to actually go back and make some semblance of what i've written so ar. early feedback from readers is generally positive. i don't handle compliments well, and i think that is what froze me up. that and not having a clear idea of where this book was going to begin with. [can we say OUTLINE?]

so as it stands now, i will briefly outline what i want to happen next. my first draft is not even broken down into chapters, and my linear plotline seems to not be so linear after all. i've got a big job in front of me. i just need to figure out how to break it down into bite-size chunks.

FM has moved into a shiny new home. i need to get myself reacquainted with everyone. many new names over there. i kinda feel like an outsider right now. but i've missed that place. online time at home is limited at the moment, but once the DSL is installed, that will be all over. i will be the internet queen once again lol.